My name is Cindy Foote. I'm married to worship songwriter, Billy Foote, who penned "You Are My King (Amazing Love)", "Sing to the King", and "You Are God Alone", to name a few. Together we have recorded worship CDs and traveled leading worship for nearly a decade, though Billy has been doing these things for two decades!
Most of what I know about music, songwriting and authentic living comes from Billy. Together we have two, going on three, children. Libby is currently 5. She was adopted from China at nine months of age. Gracie is 2 and was adopted from Ethiopia at 4.5 months old. Keemberlie (to be called Josie) is 7, but still resides in Haiti. We pray she comes home this year.
No Double Yellow Line is my dream come true. While its my debut as a songwriter it is more importantly an expression of my heart for adoption. It's my prayer that each song be a small window into our life as an adoptive family. A window that allows the listener to feel both the joy of adoption and the need for adoption/orphan care.
Lastly, No Double Yellow Line is dedicated to my girls. I cannot find enough ways to express my love for them.
Because Jesus lives,
Cindy
PS. For more about our worship ministry or to read the individual blogs for each of our adoption journeys, scroll down and click on the appropriate picture to link to those sites.
Let’s start with Grace Will Grow. Its a special day here. Three years ago on this day we met Gracie for the first time, face to face. She’d lay there in our arms, her eyes focused on us as if to say, “I’m a fighter. I’m gonna make it.”…like she knew life was about to be different.
Gracie’s start in life was rough. Born to a very poor, beautiful woman, on January 22, 2009 she was most likely born a normal birth weight. But 7 days into her life we know she was having severe diarrhea as she was taken into an orphanage on that date and was immediately given the medical attention she needed. We only know bits of the story, but around her 21st day of life she was taken into AWAA’s transition home where she she was given more medical attention. Her severe diarrhea was causing weight loss. She also had an infection that had become septic. AWAA tried every kind of formula they could obtain in ET to see what might help her gain weight. Eventually they shipped soy based formula from the States to ET just for her in hopes that it would alleviate her diarrhea.
Of course, we didn’t know all this was going on as we waited for a referral of our daughter. But God did. He put it on Libby’s heart one March morning of that year to pray for Jesus to send milk to her sister. I happened to blog about it here. That blog served as concrete confirmation on the day of Gracie’s referral. Gracie was so malnourished when we first saw her pictures. 5.6 pounds at 3.5 months of age. We had not requested a child with special needs, but we were concerned the malnourishment would cause her to have some special needs. So we needed to pray and hear from the Lord. Was this our daughter? And then he revealed her story to us. The week Libby had prayed for milk to be sent to Gracie (who we then called Lulu) was the very week that AWAA was sending the new formula to ET just for Gracie by way of another adopting family.
And that formula worked. And because the famine in ET was bringing about more and more severely malnourished babies into AWAA’s transitional home, an entire fundraiser was sparked to provide more formula for other babies like Gracie.
As we waited to travel and take Gracie into our arms, we knew God had made a promise that she would grow and thrive. And even though she was covered with chicken pox on her Metcha and Gotcha days, she was 11 pounds! She had doubled in weight in just under 2 months time.
Gracie’s story has impacted many. It still impacts our hearts, compelling us to plead with others to consider adoption. And that’s why this song was written. It was written as a gift to Gracie and it was written so God’s power in Gracie’s life could be an inspiration to others. May those who listen give babies/children like Gracie a hope and a future. And since adoption is not the only option nor the only answer to the many problems in countries like Ethiopia, may the Lord give wisdom and finances to those who will give and guide ET out of poverty!
If you are interested in adoption here is a link to our agencies ET program.
He has dominion over the deep. He has the power to keep them from separating us from our children. He can split the seas. He can walk on water. He can calm the stormy seas with one word.
The voice of the Lord breaks the cedars of Lebanon. Like lightening strikes the highest points, so the voice of the Lord brings down everything that exalts itself, every pride, every gov’t. It all rests on his shoulders, he can easily shake them.
The voice of the Lord is mighty and majestic, like thunder. He will be heard among the nations, but he will speak softly, tenderly to you, his child.
And the ears of the Lord? Are listening. He’s bent over with compassion to hear your weeping voice, your silent tears. Your’s, and your child’s. As Father to the fatherless, he is surely ready to defend the helpless.
The arm of the Lord? Strong, mighty, invisible in battle. Nothing is too difficult for him. And yet those same arms embrace, bless, carry his children.
The eyes of the Lord? Move to and fro searching for hearts that are committed fully to him in order to strengthen them. He sees. He always sees…everything. 2 Chronicles 16
The love of the Lord- how deep, how wide, how long. Nothing can separate you or your child from his love. But his love is jealous. His children will be his own. His love is like fire. It will consume what binds his children.
His ways? Who can understand? They are higher, wiser. He can be trusted. We must have faith.
How is 2012 shaping up for all you waiting-moms? Has the year been what you expected so far? For me, in many ways – yes! Our move to Amarillo has been a great transition. In other ways, no. Sunny isn’t as close to coming home as I had thought. Disappointment can bring out some ugly attributes…at least, it can for me. So, let me start this new year devotion for January (which I realize is almost over…but its not February just yet!) with that dreaded act of humility that is ever so rewarding and freeing – confession.
Confessions of a Waiting Mom…
#1: On days when I have many things to get done and two beautiful children at my heals, I often vanish into the imagination of what the day will be like when I realize I can take Sunny home. “Imagination” isn’t exactly the right word. I almost go to another place, transcend into another world and fully feel the overwhelming joy and relief that day will bring. I cry like it’s really happening right at that moment. A well-written play to be acted out in my mind regularly (drama-queen, I know). This morning I entered that place thinking of the moment Sunny and I step out of pastor’s car at the airport realizing I will miss his dear, deep eyes and pleasant smile but relishing that I don’t have to leave Sunny ever again. Tears well up at the thought, as the scene plays out in my mind….
And then I snap back to reality…another reason to cry. The time has not yet come.
I don’t walk around crying all day, just in case you were starting to feel concerned for me. But I do have those moments when I imagine Sunny is home and hope has been realized rather than deferred.
Jesus protect my heart from the sickness that comes when hope is pushed back and fill me with joy in the honor I have been given to wait on you. Help me live in the present fully; enjoying the children you have given me as I wait for Sunny to join us. Help me tear down imaginations that can lead to false expectations so I can live in the authentic reality of this journey, worshipping you in this present waiting.
#2: Watching other adoptions move beautifully through to completion for other friends is so beautiful…. But it also stings. I’m jealous they get to move on and enjoy life with their new child while Sunny still has to wait. At the same time, I have a number of friends even further behind in their adoptions….who will wait even longer than we have for Sunny. Perspective is a must-have that is not easily grasped.
Jesus, give me a heart for every orphan, like your heart. Let me fully rejoice for each one’s homecoming. Let me fully devote to pray for those who must wait longer. And help me wait better….selflessly.
#3: I have faith God hears me and sees Sunny and that he will bring her home eventually. But I often doubt he’ll really move mountains for us. Sure, I have moments of great, doubtless faith… But after two years of waiting – those two years including watching her face grow and change, it’s hard to really believe this is the moment when everything will change and He will make it happen.
Jesus, increase my faith.
#4: There is a beautiful, godly older orphan who has taken Sunny in at HCRM…she’s like Sunny’s mom. While I find this good and important and reassuring that she is being watched and cared for, I am also jealous that she gets to be Sunny’s mom-figure right now and I grieve when I think of how much Sunny will miss her once home. How can I have so many mixed emotions about this simple act of love? God has provided for Sunny an important, emotional attachment and yet I am wanting that all for myself. The ache is so big.
Jesus, teach me to trust in your plan even when it hurts. Help me to see that you are loving Sunny well in giving her this precious mother-figure.
#5. I cannot think of even one reason that would make delaying Sunny’s homecoming worthwhile, but God has not brought her home and I must continue to trust the potter with Sunny – his living, breathing, growing, needy clay.
Jesus, help me not to doubt your goodness. Remind me your ways are higher than mine and that my ache for her is a small portion of YOUR ache for her. Amen.
So, what’s your “waiting-mom confession”? Let’s bring all our doubts and fears into the light together so they can be conquered and our waiting be made fruitful in every way!
In our adoption journeys there have always been crises of faith by which I was tested and eventually strengthened, but a crisis is a crisis! I have been brought to my knees on numerous occasions praying/pleading questions like “why?”, “when?”, “are you listening?”, “do you really love me?”, or “do you really love my child?” Let me be honest, sometimes God in his mysterious ways just makes no sense to my earthly mind.
Yesterday I was in a Christian bookstore looking for a special book to read to my girls this Christmas, something that would give them a fresh perspective on the Christmas story. I scanned several great books but somehow in the middle of flipping through pages the Lord started my mind down a beautiful path as I envisioned Mary arriving into Bethlehem fully pregnant, exhausted. I pictured her looking over the vast crowd as she and Joseph began their search for an inn. I imagined the weight of all the persecution she must have encountered prior to this day – ridicule for carrying a child outside of wedlock with a crazy story of an angel announcing this would be the Son of God.
Then I imagined what I would be thinking in that moment if I had been Mary. And you know what conclusion I came to? Due to my culturally-corrupt, self-centered mind I would be seriously asking God why he didn’t at least have an Inn for me to deliver this child I had been so persecuted for carrying; so inconveniently chosen to bear the burden of being misunderstood. I’d feel like he owed me some small comfort in the midst of this calling/duty. I’d at least question if he really loved me and His Son if He wasn’t going to provide some animal-free place to go through labor. And that’s why I wasn’t chosen to be Mary, in case you were wondering… sigh…
Though I don’t know exactly what Mary was thinking I imagine she understood something I seem to forget often – that to carry the Son of God inside of her was a greater gift than any comfort. It was enough. More than enough, just to be chosen.
This is my lesson, my fresh perspective this Christmas season: There is no room to doubt the love of God, the character of God, the plan of God for his people. I have a privilege similar to Mary’s – I carry the Spirit of the Living God inside of me. This was Mary’s joy despite her circumstances. This should be mine.
Sunny just celebrated her 8th birthday yesterday (December 6). Last year we celebrated with her via Skype with cake and candles and party hats. I cried most of that day so I expected I would be emotional this time around. Not only have we been on this journey to bring her home for just one month shy of 2 years, we are also in the middle of a big move to Amarillo, TX. We leave this precious city of San Antonio in just one week. We have a huge adoption community here. I have literally dozens of precious, close friends. The iron-sharpens-iron kind of friends that you just never get over having to leave. So there is plenty of emotion to be had.
But this year there were no tears on Sunny’s birthday. This year there was peace, joy. I’m sure much of this is due to the fact that I have great hope Sunny will be home soon. And part of our peace/joy is the excitement of a new opportunities for Billy’s songwriting, a new group of believers to get to know, a new city to explore and impact with the Spirit of Adoption. But I think the peace and joy are deeper than those sweet morsels of hope. I think the difficulty of this adoption journey is finally revealing what’s been in the refining process – Increased faith and contentment in being chosen by Jesus to carry His Spirit within me to the lost. His abiding in me is, afterall, more than enough proof that God is REDEEMING LOVE.
Love came down to die for me so that I may truly live. How then shall I live? – In a way that shows how honored I am to have Him living in me!
Joy To The World
Joy to the world
The Lord has come
Let earth receive her King Let every heart prepare Him room
And heaven and nature sing
And heaven and nature sing
And heav’ and heav’ and nature sing
He rules the world with truth and grace And makes the nations prove
The glories of His righteousness
And wonders of His love
And wonders of His love
And wonders wonders of His love
No more will sin and sorrow grow
Nor thorns infest the ground;
He’ll come and make the blessings flow
Far as the curse was found,
Far as the curse was found,
Far as, far the curse was found.
Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee
Joyful, Joyful we adore Thee
God of glory, Lord of love
Hearts unfold like flowers before Thee,
Opening to the sun above.
Melt the clouds of sin and sadness;
Drive the dark of doubt away;
Giver of immortal gladness
Fill us with the light of day!
All Thy works with joy surround Thee,
Earth and heaven reflect Thy rays,
Stars and angels sing around Thee,
Center of unbroken praise.
Field and forest, vale and mountain,
Flowery meadow, flashing sea,
Singing bird and flowing fountain
Call us to rejoice in Thee.
Thou art giving and forgiving,
Ever blessing, ever blessed,
Wellspring of the joy of living,
Ocean depth of happy rest!
Thou our Father, Christ our Brother,
All who live in love are Thine;
Teach us how to love each other,
Lift us to the joy divine.
Mortals, join the happy chorus,
Which the morning stars began; Father love is reigning o’er us,
Brother love binds man to man,
Ever singing, march we onward, Victors in the midst of strife,
Joyful music leads us Sunward In the triumph song of life!
This is beautiful. How quick I am to whine and grumble when things get a little uncomfortable. I am SURE I would have whined big time about giving birth with animals looking on.
I actually read and enjoyed your post yesterday, but when it came back up in my mind this morning (because I felt myself slipping into a bit of a grumble) and I was reminded that I am carrying the Spirit of the Living God inside of me, and that is enough…well, I knew I needed to come back by and tell you what a great post this is.
When it sticks with you and continues to work in your heart…that’s a great post.
cindy, i’ve been thinking about mary’s delivery story too. i’ve been convicted about choosing what’s comfortable rather than what may be right. i love your perspective too. beautiful words, paired together with that precious heart of yours, makes for a lovely devotional with such Truth. love ya, sista.
This semester of home school I have been reading a chapter of “The Jesus Storybook Bible” to my girls each morning. If you are not familiar with this children’s Bible its worth your time to read more about it here. It puts Scripture into beautiful stories children can understand, and honestly, sometimes it gives me a fresh perspective as well and moves me to tears.
A couple of mornings ago I was reading the chapter called “The Singer” which covers a portion of the Sermon on the Mount from Matthew 6,9 and Luke 12. In the story Jesus is reminding his people that the birds don’t worry about food and the flowers don’t worry about clothes. They know their Maker will feed and clothe them. At the end of the story it reads,
“Even though people had forgotten, the birds and the flowers hadn’t forgotten – they still knew their song. It was the song all God’s creation had sung to him from the very beginning. It was the song people’s hearts were made to sing: ‘God made us. He loves us. He is very pleased with us.’ It was why Jesus had come into the world: to sing them that wonderful song; to sing it not only with his voice, but with his whole life – so that God’s children could remember it and join in and sing it, too.”
As I read that to my girls I had the overwhelming sense that this story was for me at that very moment. In a season of life in which we find ourselves nearing the end or our 7th consecutive year of international adoption journeys, we also find ourselves packing our house to make a big move to Amarillo, TX in what has been one of the busiest years of our lives. I have been to Haiti 6 times in the last 18 months for this last adoption journey while homeschooling, traveling for my husband’s ministry, recording a new album, and all the other things life swings our way… dishes, laundry, melt-downs, etc. It’s been a packed year and to end it with a thousand good-byes to be said and another thousand “first-times-in-a-new-city”…well, it can all be a bit overwhelming. And sometimes I have forgotten I have no need to worry. The God who made me also wrote my story a long, long time ago. And it’s a perfect one because HE wrote into it His rescue plan for me, His protection plan, His provision plan.
After I read this story and pondered it for a minute a chorus to a new song popped into my head. I still have to work on the verses, but the chorus says,
This is my song declaring I believe
The King of kings, He cares for me
I have no worries
I have no worries
This is my song to sing when everything
Is crashing in on this belief
The One who made me
Will meet my every need
This is my song.
(c) 2011 Poetic Present Songs
Maybe you need to remember this today, too. Maybe your adoption journey feels like it will never end. Maybe your emotions for your child-to-be are so heavy you can’t move. Maybe your sense of timing cannot fathom how God’s timing can be right. Maybe your prayers for your child don’t even have words anymore because the journey is just that hard. Maybe you are getting ready to travel to your child’s country and your head is spinning with packing lists and before-travel jitters. Maybe you are about to meet your child’s birthparents and you wonder if you’ll have the right things to say, the right questions to ask. Maybe you are waiting for your first child and you are scared to become a parent. Maybe you owe money for the next step of adoption and you have no idea where the money will come from. The list of maybe’s goes on.
While the list of things you could possibly be worrying over never ends, one thing remains true, faithful. Jesus. Your Maker loves you. Your child’s Maker loves him/her. And the story is already written for you both. The only thing missing is a heart ready to sing in the midst of earthly trials, “I have no worries because My Maker loves me and will meet all my needs.” Declare it today. Remind yourself. You have no worries. This is your worship song of trust today.
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